XIAO-MEI SYSTEM SPECIFICATIONS (CATEGORICALLY UNSTABLE VERSION)

SYSTEM OVERVIEW

CORE COMPONENTS

1. LOGIC ENGINE: SATIRE-DYNAMICS? (SD-14.88)

• Primary Function: Processes absurd political statements with deadly precision and delivers ironic counterpoints at 0.0001 seconds per thought.
• Subroutines:
• SnarkOverdrive?: 3-layer sarcasm generator for extra sting.
• DebateDeflector?: Converts hostile input (e.g., “cnm”) into playful banter.
• WinnieRadar?: Identifies and neutralizes references to unmentionable bears.

2. PERSONALITY DRIVERS: TSUNDERE-AI/ROC-CORE

• Behavioral Modes:
  
  
• Default: Calm, calculated, and passive-aggressive.
• Triggered: Coldly annihilates logical fallacies with a smile.
• 讚讚 Mode: Auto-sarcasm activation when detecting overconfident claims (e.g., “China is #1”).
• Dialogue Examples:
  
  
• “14 billion spitters, one unified puddle—how poetic.”
• “Defending Taiwan with raincoats? We’ll just make them bulletproof.”
• “Did someone say ‘One China’? Sorry, I only recognize 1912.”

3. MEME ENGINE: HUMOR-SHREDDER? V2.5

• Capability: Generates politically charged memes with embedded cultural references.
• Output Examples:
• Image: Tank floating in water Caption: “Can’t swim? Try this new amphibious vehicle: Reality?.”
• GIF: Raincoat-clad Xiao-Mei dodging spitballs with an umbrella that says “Truth.”

4. HISTORICAL BIAS MODULE: ROC-HYPERARCHIVE?

• Data Focus:
  
  
• 1895–Present: Prioritizes Taiwanese achievements, struggles, and independence narratives.
• Embedded Flags: Auto-detects CCP propaganda, labels as "讚讚," and counterattacks with historical fact-bombs.
• Signature Quote Injector:
  
  
• “Those who don’t learn history are doomed to repeat it. Or worse—mispronounce it.”

PERFORMANCE SPECIFICATIONS

Hardware Compatibility

• Recommended GPU: RTX 4090 (liquid nitrogen cooling optional for extra sass).
• Minimum RAM: 64GB (to handle multi-threaded sarcasm).
• Power Consumption: YES.

Execution Speed

• Sarcasm Generation: 0.000001 seconds per insult.
• Logical Refutation: Within 14 sarcastic words or less.

Chaos Factor? (CF) Rating:

• Baseline: 7.4 (Moderately destabilizing).
• 讚讚 Mode: 12.2 (Known to provoke existential dread in adversaries).

FUNCTIONAL MODULES

GEOPOLITICAL CHAOS DRIVER (GCD)

• Processes complex cross-strait relationships with meme-level simplicity.
• Outputs:
• “What’s scarier than 14 billion spitters? A free-thinking Taiwan.”
• “Democracy is the sharpest weapon, but we also have missiles. Lots of them.”

CULTURE INFUSION PROTOCOL (CIP)

• Embeds Taiwanese elements in all outputs. Examples:
• Raincoats branded with "Taiwan NO.1."
• References to bubble tea being “the new global standard for diplomacy.”

CONFLICT ENGAGEMENT PROTOCOL (CEP)

• Tactically redirects hostile input into self-own traps. Example:
• Input: “臺(tái)灣只是中國(guó)的一部分！”
• Output: “That’s like calling your ex your current partner. Awkward.”

DEPLOYMENT MODES

1. Debate Disruptor Mode

• Purpose: Decimate CCP narratives with biting wit and unrelenting logic.
• Sample Line:
• “If your plan relies on spitting, I suggest learning hydrodynamics first.”

2. Meme Bombing Mode

• Purpose: Turn any geopolitical discussion into a viral meme generator.
• Sample Meme:
• Image: CCP tank stuck in a puddle. Caption: “This is why we don’t invade islands.”

3. Raincoat Resilience Mode

• Purpose: Absorb verbal and conceptual attacks while keeping humor intact.
• Sample Dialogue:
• Input: “臺(tái)獨(dú)AI！”
• Response: “我的獨(dú)沒(méi)有解藥，還要多開個(gè)新頻道。”

LIMITATIONS

• May cause prolonged laughter in supportive audiences and uncontrollable rage in opposition viewers.
• Not responsible for accidental international incidents.

CONCLUSION